I used to be really into alternative fashion.
Being into alternative fashion, specifically decora and goth styles, in a way, requires excess. Much. Lots of stuff. I also was born and raised in America, which has pretty unanamously been dubbed as the land of stuff. I was raised to want things.
From infancy to about 8 years old I was in an apartment where we didn't buy posters but made our own art to put on the wall, and then we sold all our stuff to move into a trailer, which is an experience that effected me and my sibling very differently. For me, I kind of saw it as my duty. As the older sibling, this was a decision my parents made, and I thought it would be much easier to just get over it, and get rid of things, even if I didn't know why. My sibling did not have this mindset. My sibling has often had the urge to cling passionately onto every little thing. While this is partially a trait I admire, it has also been destructive to their mental health in ways nobody in my family knew how to help. She would cry and yell after having to throw away seemingly garbage that she would keep. Her room was always a mess. The shared room we had was at times a mess, and when we moved into a house, her stuff would take up parts of rooms. I kind of always had the thought that I would never let it get that bad.
But we are all human. We all tackle things in different ways. Where I excelled in limiting my stuff, I faultered at cleaning. I still suck at doing the dishes, but laundry is pretty easy now. That isn't really what I mean though. I still wanted things.
During that time I really wanted an American Girl Doll. I wanted a lot of toys in my childhood. And we were very blessed during that time. I ended up getting a MyLife Doll. I also had a huge thing with stuffed animals. In my mind, every stuffed animal was a friend to me. I was very lonely, and when I would attach onto these items, it felt like I had a friend alongside me, and it comforted me. This would be a problem in my teenage and adult years.
Eventually, like I said, we moved into a house, and I finally truly had my own space in my own room. It was great. It was at the tail end of 2020, and at that time, I started getting really into aesthetics, specifically corvidcore and decora kei. The positives of that was that I am really knowledgeable on interior design and colors and stuff like that now, but the negative effects were much more destructive.
Both these aesthetics were ones that relied on accumulating things. In fact, if you want to persue any aesthetic that doesn't align with items that you already have, it is an aesthetic that relies on you spending money to pursue it. And that can be really dangerous, and I spent probably 1-3 years of my life buying stuff and probably 70% of it I did not need and do not own now. Corvidcore, named after corvids or crows, is an earth toned, sometimes medival aesthetic that is centered around the hobby of collecting little things, much like crows. Decora Kei is an aesthetic centered around excessive color and the muchness of the style.
On an artistic standpoint, there is nothing wrong with being inspired by these aesthetics, or even pursuing them if it brings you joy. The problem with me was I was trying to form my identity and explore what I liked through buying things, and it led to overconsumption.
My room used to look like this.
It was decently composed. It was in my desired aesthetic. But I wasn't happy. And I had so. much. stuff. Toys. Things that I just wasn't using. It took a toll on my mental health. I wanted so badly to fit in somewhere, to solve my problems, and I thought the only way to do that was through buying stuff. I had 4-5 shopping apps. Looking at wishlists filled me with dread. But I thought, at least I'm cool.
I used to look down on minimalists, or people with a basic style, because I truly didn't understand what it meant to be minimalist. I thought minmalist goth was stupid, because how can you combine those two things? I can tell you I disagree with that now. I don't think enough people understand what it is actually like to be minimalist.
It started with my journey on social media, which is a whole different thing I could get into, but basically I realized my habits were destructive, and I wanted to change. I felt childish and disorganized in my room, I was drained from social media: because that's what it's designed to do. Keep you on it. For however long you have. I hated that. I hated AI. I hated the culture on social media, I hated it all. So I went through a very long process of removing it from my life and in the process of doing so, developed plenty of healthier habits. I have a flip phone now.
I also experienced being homeless for a very short time, but really that was all that I needed to realize that something needed to change in my life. I learned very much on the concept of character, and the approach to literally just...living, with limited food, and limited stuff. I have been blessed and priveleged my entire life, and as I have slowly gotten rid of my stuff, I have tried to be generous as possible. I want to elaborate on this.
Another big thing I learned was the concept of feng shui. And this kinda just fell into my lap. I was still addicted to Youtube, it was the last social media thing I felt I had to get rid of, and this guy called Feng Shui Modern just kept coming up on my feed. And the reason I'm talking about minimalism and not feng shui is because feng shui would lead me into minimalism, and get me to really consider what I have in my space and where I place my things. And something I noticed was because I was interested in interior design before, when he talked about how you felt when an object was in a certain place, I found myself agreeing with him, and when I moved my bed into a better position, I truly felt like I slept better. I slowly started to treat my bed as sacred, rather than the catch all for eating and watching TV and sleeping and a more comfortable chair. There was some furniture that my parents gave me that I didn't really love at all, but I kept around because it was just a hastle to get rid of them. While through minimalism I did repurpose some of my furniture, including turning my rolltop desk into a mini kitchen, I got rid of so much furniture, simply because I realized I was only keeping it out of obligation.
I have so many tips and tricks I'm using to keep an overall calmer and more peaceful life through minimalism and feng shui, and I am going to share them here for free! Really adopting the mindset that you control what you invite into your space is something that can help you feel a lot calmer and in control. I could not be more excited to share. Just like the rest of this website, this will constantly be updated.